Thursday, November 30, 2006

What do you do if you don't know how a long gone legend looks like?

Put the photo of a living legend above the dead legends name in the obituary column.

A balding man's bland excuse

Source: Rediff

India's balding out of form stand-in captain now wants to blame Dravid and Sachin for India's pathetic losing streak in SA.

"India's stand-in captain Virender Sehwag said Rahul Dravid's absence and the poor form of Sachin Tendulkar put enormous pressure on the rest of the young and inexperienced batsmen in the fourth cricket one-dayer in Port Elizabeth against South Africa on Wednesday."

What are the other players in the team then? Freshers? Some of them have played a significant amount of one day matches. Kaif, Raina, Dhoni - inexperienced?

Sehwag also felt India missed having experienced batsmen in the middle-order as South Africa had also started off badly but could recover because they had tried and tested players in their ranks.

"Dravid's absence hurt us in this game. He is the kind of batsman who tries to bat out overs in the middle-order. The other batsmen then can feed around him," he said at the post-match press conference.

"Tendulkar's failure also puts pressure. When a big player fails, the rest of the batters come under pressure."

Then what is your role in the team Sehwag? Waterboy?

"We are not opening well and are losing far too many wickets in the first 10-15 overs. Youngsters thus are confronted with a huge task.

"South Africa are also starting badly but they are able to recover because they have experienced cricketers like Jacques Kallis and Herschelle Gibbs in the middle. That is not the case with us."

A classic case of passing the buck, a trend that is so common in Indian politics.

But Sehwag begged fans back home to be patient and give them some more time to come to terms with the tough conditions in South Africa.

"I want the fans to keep trust in us. Things cannot change in a day and it will take time. We will improve," he said.

That will never happen. People are becoming deaf listening to this oft repeated excuse.

Petrol and communists

Ok, so the central government is going to reduce fuel prices starting today, Rs 2 for petrol and Rs 1 for diesel. But that is a very marginal difference. A Rs 2 cut in petrol won't matter that much at all. The price is still in the high 40s.

But we still haven't started to realise that our over dependence of this precious commodity, over which countries have fought wars or are busy overthrowing governments and destroying countries so that supply lines are not cut is starting to run out. What about alternate fuels? Whatever happened to the Save Oil, Save India launched by state controlled petrol firms a few years ago? Won't we ever learn? There is no space on the road and traffic jams are becoming common nowadays. And we have the car manufacturers launching new car models every month.

And then we have our commie brethren who want the government to reduce prices even further.

"The Communist Party of India (Marxist) welcomed the decision to cut prices of petrol and diesel but said the Government should slash them further.

CPI (M) leader Sitaram Yechury told reporters here that "we expect that the burden would be reduced further on consumers in keeping with international fuel prices."


Some people never learn.



Ever noticed most of the people in this city don't smile that much? You can see them in their moody best on the way to work or stuck in traffic. That serious look on the face, crease lines crowding the forheads. This has spread to entertaiment too, and the print media. Look at Tamil movies, in the dance sequences, the extras never smile. Yesterday, there was a feature in the Hindu Metro Plus edition about learning to dance(I don't remember the name of the article or the dance form), the three younsters who were featured in the photo look constipated. Look at news shows or games shows on Tamil channels, no body smiles. Look at the face of local politicians in banners and cutouts, very serious with not an iota of happiness on their faces.

Look at Rahul Dravid, captain of a team who's sport does not deserve that much media or fan frenzy at all. He looks like he is going to shit a tonne of bricks.

Why don't people smile? Is it because of that fact that a person will label you a loony if you smile?

You don't have to flash your brilliant white or dirty dentures at people. Just smile. Just make the familiar curve with your lips. Research has shown that smiling relieves stress.

Did you know that smiling requires less effort than frowning? Did you also know that smiling can actually make you feel happier?

Research has shown that the muscles in our faces that allow us to smile actually stimulate our brain and when this part of the brain is stimulated, it makes us feel happy. So, even if you feel sad, irritated, angry or frustrated, just by smiling, it will make you feel better. Apart from the benefit to ourselves of smiling, smiling at others can make them feel happier too.


There's even an article which says that women who smile during PMS can reduce stress.

Be sure to smile and compliment people as well. Studies show that even faking a smile reduces stress and puts you in a slightly better mood. Most people cannot tell if you are faking anyway.


Smile away.


Monday, November 27, 2006

Theatres or censor boards?

Saw Casino Royale at Santham theatre in the Satyam Complex in Madras last week but was not able to enjoy the movie to the maximum. Here's why:

1. There were too many cuts, very glaring cuts. I first thought that they were editing problems but it turns out that theses were censor cuts.

2. A droning a/c system inside the theatre put paid to my efforts of listening to the dialogues, because that's what this movie is all about, more dialogues and less action, atypical to the other Bond movies that have come out.

3. Buzzing cell phones and irritating patrons who think the theatre is the place to gossip and not to watch a movie, irrespective of the fact the people around them pay exorbitant amounts to get tickets. I can't help that, people have to change.

4. The move has already been certified A(I think) for scenes of violence and some mature situations. The cuts I was talking about in point 1 seem to have been done by the theatre owners themselves. I guess this is common. I have observed this in some theatres.
Then wtf is the job of the CBFC (Central Board for Film Certification - very lousy website!!) ?

5. I heard kids bawling inside the theatre. Small kids for an A rated movie? Why can't theatres enforce rules like barring people who are not mature for movies with mature themes? I had the same experience watching Terminator 3. Children for a movie that is clearly for restricted audiences. And you parents blame the theatre owners for showing mature movies and such like.

I would gladly love to kick the ass of the Satyam theatre owner. You ruined my movie experience on Friday night.

A person watching a movie will loose interest, rhythm and flow not to mention getting confused with the sequence of events if the cuts are very glaring.

Bah! It's madcap experiences like these that make me yearn for bootleg copies of newly released movies.

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Saturday, November 25, 2006

Alphabet Soup!

A is for Agony. Watching Indians face the short-pitched delivery.
B is for BCCI. A clueless bunch running high on sponsorship and low on IQ
C is for Crazy. The kind that calls for Chappell’s head three months before the cup
D is for Decibel. Shouting parliamentarians know a thing or two about it.
E is for Envy. We get to be intimate with it when we watch the Aussies continue to maul.
F is for Front Foot. The art of moving your feet. Not sticking it in your rear.
G is for Gorilla. The 700 pound obsession of this gullible nation.
H is for His Highness. Scores of 6 and 43 in a Ranji trophy match sadly don’t help.
I is for idiocy. Vengsarkar asked to board a plane to convey “sentiments” c’mon!
J is for Jokers. We have plenty of them on the BCCI’s payroll.
K is for Khokho. A needless ill-timed diversion.
L is for Lara. A gentleman. A genius.
M is for Millions. The bored and irritated kind. Not the money floating in some accounts.
O is for Overseas. Usually when things start to unravel.
P is for the Panic. Both in the media and the public. Most scream. Some write.
Q is for Quilting. Shouldn’t we be investing more time in it?
R is for Rain. And it’s nagging dedication to the Indian team.
S is for Sachin. Glimpses of a bygone era.
T is for the Touarag. The new wonder that can haul a plane not just your mother-in-law.
U is Ubiquitous. The nauseating “Aaya India” advertisement. V is Victory. Wonder how it feels?
W is for the “World cup”. And the wait.
X is for eXcruciating. The mindless banter in the guise of post-match analysis.
Y is for Yellow. The color that makes you green.
Z is for Zilch, Zero. The number of fans that will follow this team after this tour.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Boo hoo India

Just remember the song in the movie "Kaho Na Pyar Hai ".

Ek Paal Ka Jeena

Phir To Hain Jaana

Tohfa Kya Leke Jaayie

Dil Yeh Bataana

Khali Haath Aaye The Hum

Khali Haath Jayenge

Bus Pyar Ke Do Meethen Bol Jhilmilayenge

To Hans Kyon Ki Duniya Ko Hain Hasana

Ae Mere Dil Tu Gaye Ja

*Ae Aaye Aao Aaye Aa*

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Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Easy to use condoms

Ever wanted a condon when you were going to get laid? Have you been frustrated by condom packets and that sticky lubricant on your fingers? Gone mad searching for the part of the condom you have to wear and your mood goes for a toss by the time the thing sits on your mini me?

Rejoice, for Pronto is here. Pronto, a South African company has released an easy to use condom.

The PRONTO condom can be applied in a few seconds. And it’s a lot more convenient to use, compared to an ordinary condom. You simply crack the pack open and unroll the condom directly onto the penis.

Courtesy - Pronto web site

Get a load of their hugely popular instructional video:

Tags: condom,, safe, sex

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Courtesy: Pure Smiles

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Prospective names for new films by Tamil actors

Rajini: Sivaji, MGR, Gemini Ganesan,Nagesh……..

Vijaykanth: Dharmapuri, Masala poori, Chola poori , Pani poori….

Arya: Vattaram, Muconam, Chathurangam….

Vijay: Sachin, Dravid, Kumble, Dhoni……

Surya: 6, 7,8 ,9 ….

Jeeva: E, Erumbu, Kosu, Kambilipoochi…..

SharathKumar: Thalaimagan, Chithappamagan, Athaimagan, Marumagan….

Ajith: Varalaru,, Areviyal, Kanakku, English…

Kamal: Vetaiyadu Vilayadu, Kabadi Vilayadu, Olin ju Vilayadu……

Courtesy - Pure smiles

The world's best terrorist


1) Which is the only country in the world to have dropped bombs on over twenty different countries since 1945?

2) Which is the only country to have used nuclear weapons?

3) Which country was responsible for a car bomb which killed 80 civilians in Beirut in 1985, in a botched assassination attempt, thereby making it the most lethal terrorist bombing in modern Middle East history?

4) Which country's illegal bombing of Libya in 1986 was described by the UN Legal Committee as a "classic case" of terrorism?

5) Which country rejected the order of the International Court of Justice (ICJ) to terminate its "unlawful use of force" against Nicaragua in 1986, and then vetoed a UN Security Council resolution calling on all states to observe international law?

6) Which country was accused by a UN-sponsored truth commission of providing "direct and indirect support" for "acts of genocide" against the Mayan Indians in Guatemala during the 1980s?

7) Which country unilaterally withdrew from the Anti-Ballistic Missile (ABM) Treaty in December 2001?

8) Which country renounced the efforts to negotiate a verification process for the Biological Weapons Convention and brought an international conference on the matter to a halt in July 2001?

9) Which country prevented the United Nations from curbing the gun trade at a small arms conference in July 2001?

10) Aside from Somalia , which is the only other country in the world to have refused to ratify the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child?

11) Which is the only Western country which allows the death penalty to be applied to children?

12) Which is the only G7 country to have refused to sign the 1997 Mine Ban Treaty, forbidding the use of landmines?

13) Which is the only G7 country to have voted against the creation of the International Criminal Court (ICC) in 1998?

14) Which was the only other country to join with Israel in opposing a 1987 General Assembly resolution condemning international terrorism?

15) Which country refuses to fully pay its debts to the United Nations yet reserves its right to veto United Nations resolutions?

The answer is - whoa, am no going to tell you. Use your grey cells. It's very obvious.

Courtesy - Puresmiles

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Horse sense?

Courtesy - Ranga

This story is with respect to the fact that the clown of Indian politics sold his horse to another clown for RS 110,000.

Lalu prasad yadav has a horse. He is called Pawan. Now Pawan Prasad Yadav is a smart beauty. He can only speak English and doesn’t indulge in horsey. But alas he is being sold. I can well imagine how that conversation went…

Lalu: Hey Pawan!

Pawan: hey dude. Nice haircut!

Lalu:Thank you. My wife styled it for me.

Pawan: Cool. You should try highlights some time… Will make you look young.

Lalu: But I came here to meet you on another topic…

Pawan: Yeah…

Lalu: Pawan, you are a fine horse…

Pawan: I know…

Lalu: But I can’t keep you anymore. Can’t afford it.

Pawan: What!

Lalu: Pawan, don’t take it personally. It came as a surprise to me. Just last night my accountant sat me and my wife and went through our investment portfolio and he suggested that we take certain steps. Certain austerity measures. And one of his suggestions was that I sell you.

Pawan: Bastard!

Lalu: I will make sure you are in able hands. A person who will ensure that you get the best oatmeal and the finest magazines. The new Yorker. Mid-day. Horse and country. You can’t do this to me! I stood by you. Throught thick and thin. Through the fodder scam. I gave you plenty of advice on that railway restructuring thingy.
It is all for the best pawan.

Pawan: No! listen to me. Pappu. These corporate goons are giving you the wrong advice. They will confuse you. You need me to explain the world. I have been educated for a reason. Besides, I have plans. I want to be this country’s first horse to become a prime minister. And I need you for that ride. And if you help me get there I promise I will give you any portfolio that you seek…

Lalu: But I want to be PM myself. A childhood dream of mine…

Pawan: No. PM is not for everyone. You need to constantly speak. Give interviews.
I can do that. No. I mean… speak intelligently. On matters of policy. The nations stand on many thorny topics. And not be too emotional. Especially on those touchy border issues.

Lalu: I can do that! I can do that!

Pawan: Ok. Let me make you an offer. You get me to delhi. And support me on my campaign. And In return I will ensure you get the defence portfolio.

Lalu: But is it an interesting job?

Pawan: Of course! You will have plenty of bright red buttons to press. And of course you will have a huge pad where you can lounge in the backyard with those illiterate donkeys.

Lalu: Sounds interesting…

Pawan: You bet! Imagine the kind of deals you can strike. Multi-billion stuff. You can make so much money that you would probably need to buy an island just to keep it. How’s that for financial advice!

Lalu: Great!

Pawan: Deal!

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Monday, November 20, 2006

Infact daughter?

Found this on Rediff.

Read the last sentence in the section marked red. What's an infact daughter? Some one failed to proof read the text before putting it on the web.


KFC and Me

I had only one thing in my mind when I left work- buy KFC. Two pieces, a didn't matter. KFC recently opened it's first outlet in Chennai at the Ascenda Techno Park, Taramani. Considerably late.

Pity, Bangalore has two outlets, as far as I knw, the last time I eat in a KFC outlet there was in 2003, I had a burger. I remember seeing a PETA ad featuring the ever busty Pam Anderson exhorting people not to eat KFC. And Bangalore is not a metro. What's this with a lot of the major brands choosing Bangalore over Madras? The same goes for music bands. Ok enough ranting, back to the point.

So I waded through rush hour traffic from Mount Road to Taramani and finally got to the Ascenda park. The taste of some food products is so amazing that they stay in your taste glands for a long long time. They are hard to forget. Just like the movies, you will have a favorite movie you keep seeing even if TV channels telecast re-runs.

KFC is one of them. I can't forget the crispy, crunchy fried chicken, that smell from over 17 years back. My folks used to buy KFC every Friday when my dad was working in Kuwait. They had these freebies with every meal, the taste was so good you could keep going back for more.

Keeping all of this in mind, I entered the Planet Yum food court in the Ascendas IT park, a veritable selection of foods from major food chains, from pizzas to chat from Movenpick ice creams to Qwiky's espressos. I decided to go for an order of large fries for my sistah. Me, being a newly converted gym rat with more preference on protein and less carbs opted for a bucket of chicken, 8 pieces@250with plans of peeling the skin before sinking my teeth into the soft juicy flesh.

The smell was the same, it was the original fried chicken. Satisfied and armed with my treasure, I set for home. My head was reeling under that familiar sweet aroma of KFC's special fried chicken. I got home, got into my pj's, sat on the dining table, opened the bucket, took out a leg piece, poured some sauce on the plate and peeled the skin off the piece. I sank my teeth into it only to discover that there was limited flesh on the bone. More skin and less of the juicy flesh I had expected. What a disaster. All 8 pieces of it. Disappointing. I was used to the sight of KFC advertising whole chicken pieces with plenty of flesh. This was a shame. (BTB I didn't gobble 8 pieces in one night. I kept 4 for next day, satiating my appetite for protein)

Same smell, smaller chicken. Honey, KFC has shrunk the chicken. Buk buk bakaw.

I recalled reading a post on Rashmi's blog where Rasmhi posted a guy's rant about the KFC he had in India and charging a bomb for inferior quality food:

"When you bite into the chicken leg you would expect a certain amount of meat to be seen, the white fleshy part but no, instead you hit the bone. THERE IS NO FLESH ON THIS ONE..."

I did remember seeing veggie meals. Veggie meals in a chicken outlet? Gimme a break. Is KFC going the McDonalds way with their veggie Mctikkas and veggie burgers? Blech.

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Friday, November 17, 2006

Four ways to spend money

There are four ways in which you can spend money. You can spend your own money on yourself. When you do that, why then you really watch out what you’re doing, and you try to get the most for your money. Then you can spend your own money on somebody else. For example, I buy a birthday present for someone. Well, then I’m not so careful about the content of the present, but I’m very careful about the cost. Then, I can spend somebody else’s money on myself. And if I spend somebody else’s money on myself, then I’m sure going to have a good lunch! Finally, I can spend somebody else’s money on somebody else. And if I spend somebody else’s money on somebody else, I’m not concerned about how much it is, and I’m not concerned about what I get.

Courtesy - Pure Smiles

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Rahul kept staring at the lady in the airport lounge. He had come to see off his cousin who was on his way to Houston in the U.S of A. She was gorgeous, wore a tight red shirt and had a large bosom. His eyes never left her. He never thought of the fact that he was visually raping the lady and that she was feeling very edgy.

Blissfully unaware of that fact that she was staring back at him, he stood there transfixed, marvelling at this pretty creature. He was snapped out his revere by his cousin as he bid goodbye before disappearing in the secure area of the airport for security checks.

Time flew and it was not until he read of harassment against women on the street and in public places did he realise that what he did that day had made her uncomfortable. Instances of roadside romeos whistling and staring at women, fondling in public transport, all of this sickened him. Women are to be looked at and admired and just like museum pieces and not to be harmed, he decided.

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Thursday, November 16, 2006

Poets and Presidents

Courtesy Ranga.

Our silver haired mop top president is a man of abundant energy. He is very patriotic and passionate. He writes a lot, talks a lot and travels a lot. He writes poetry too… I recently read one of his poems.

The grand Scene of birth of Independent India
In that mid-night, the flag of the ruler of two centuries lowered; The tri-color Indian flag flaps in the Red Fort in the midst of National Anthem.
The first vision of Independent India was dawned.

The rejoice everywhere, happiness all around,
There was a tender cry: where is the father of the nation?
The white clothed soul walking in the midst of sorrows and pain,
Injected by hatred and ego, the result of communal violence.

The father of the nation, Mahatma, walking bare footed
In the streets of Bengal for peace and harmony
With the strength of blessed soul of Mahatma
I pray the Almighty: When will be the dawn of second vision?

Create thoughts in the minds of my people,
And transform those thoughts into action.
Embed the thought of Nation being bigger than
The individual, in the minds of leaders and people.

Help all the leaders of my country to give strength
And bless the nation with peace and prosperity.
Give strength to all my religious leaders to bring
'Unity of Minds' among all our billion people

Oh Almighty, bless all my people to work and transform
Our country from a developing into a developed nation.
Let this second vision be born out of sweat of my people,
And bless our youth to live in Developed India.

It starts out with an impassioned plea to the almighty. He paints the image of the birth of our nation. The dawn of our independence from two hundred years of Anglo-Saxon rule. But there were problems even at the onset. Communal violence was huge. Poor old Gandhi was marching in the streets of Bengal wading his way through a pool of blood when the tri-color fluttered for the first time in the capital.

The poet feels that we are now in the dawn of the second vision. Here he makes yet another plea to the almighty to help us achieve this second vision. A vision filled with sweat and toil, strength and unity, peace and prosperity. And of course our youth.

But I hate to say it. It reads badly. It is way too wordy. And looks like a text culled straight out of a "how not to write poetry" guide. So without much ado I have taken the liberty to edit it. For a start, trim down the words a bit without losing the vision. It will certainly help our SMS addled youth that is so dear to our president.

The tri-color flaps.
Independent India has dawned.

Happiness all around,
Suddenly a tender cry: Where is?
The father of the nation?

Mahatma, walking,
Bare footed in the streets of Bengal
For peace and harmony

With the strength of Mahatma
I pray to the Almighty:
Isn't now the dawn of second vision?

Create thoughts
And transform into action.
in the minds of leaders and people.

Give peace and prosperity.
strength to all religious leaders
'Unity of Minds' to our billions

bless our developing country, Oh Almighty,
In sweat of my people, let this second vision be born
and bless our youth

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Convert files without downloading specific software

Zamzar, a company based in the United States has launched an online file conversion tool called Zamsar. This nifty tool will help you convert files into different file formats online. There is a cap on the file conversion size of course. You can convert files of size of upto a 100 MB. Zamsar has a simple interface and helps you to convert files in four easy steps.

You don't have to download different file conversion tools everytime you want to convert a file.

Let's hope a downloadable version of this is available in the future.

Click here to read a list of file formats that are supported by Zamzar. I tried to convert a text file but got this message - File conversion not supported for .txt.

Read their blog here.

If you are wondering how the tool got it's name, go here.

Lifehacker has a post on the tool.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Drunk driving and the laxity of laws

The media has been going all out on the very recent drunk driving mow and kill case that happened earlier this week. A car full of drunk revellers ran on some pavement dwellers, killing 7 and injuring atleast 14 people in Bombay. The driver of the car has been slapped with a barrage of IPC violations while his partners-in-crime have been let off the hook on a paltry bail of Rs 5000 each. Add a very innocous statement from the mayhem master and you feel like taking a knife and slitting the bugger's fat throat.

In actuality, both the sides have to be blamed:

1. The driver of the car for getting drunk up to his nose, yet having the gall to drive around looking for more booze.
2. Migrant labourers who choose to sleep on the pavements that are meant for pedestrian use.
3. Migrant Labourers sleeping on road medians, making themeselves juicy targets for speed junkies in large trucks and snazzy cars.

Hell, I missed getting mowed down by an Ambassador today morning at about 5.40 a.m on my way to the gym. The stretch I take to the gym is not monitored in the early hours making it a free for all. Had I applied the breaks, I would have landed in hospital. I just kept going, pleased that I was in one piece and remembering that quote from the 2002 James Bond flick Die Another Day : You live to die another day. Right on. Made a lot of since that point of time.

Coming back to the drunk driving case, Indian laws that are used to punish such douche bags are like toothless elders. All gaggle and no teeth to bite. It is illegal for pavements to be encroached upon by small business or humans. Animals using the pavement to poop and block access is a different issue altogether. When something bad happens, the pavement dwellers don't blame themselves for inviting danger to their doorstep. My sympathies to the vicims but I think it's time we examine the larger picture.

In the case of Mumbai,

1. There is a huge influx of migrants from all over the country coming in search of work with stars in their eyes.
2. The city's infrastructure is at a breaking point.
3. There are no guest houses for labourers to rest for the night. So where do they go? To the pavements braving nosey cops, animals and of course, death on wheels.

Common occurances

1. Penalties for drunk driving are like shit. The law differentiates betwwen the haves and have nots. The affluent are allowed to go scott free, while the victimised are treated like dirt or paid off to keep their mouths shut.
2. All the warnings you see on public transport like:

a. Don't drive and drive
b. Speed thrills but kills
c. Drunken Driving is an offence that is punishable by a jail term for 2 years, Rs xxxx in fines or cancellation of licenses.

are useless.

The third part is what has been exploited by people. There are big loopholes in the law that allows people to get away with lighter sentences, cancellation of licenses won't deter speed junkies because you can buy you new license from an RTO tout. What a shame.

The people are not educated enough to understand that if your blood alcohol limit exceeds a certain count, you start to feel drowsy and will not be in control of yourself. All this inspite of having high flying degrees, fat paychecks and a wardrobe full of designer clothes. When will people learn? US laws are much tougher than the one's in India. Enforcing the same kind of laws in India is a logistical nightmare because of the ever growing population.

Law enforcers themselves turn a blind eye to such incidents sometimes. There are reports of cops using their police cars to ferry their family men and how these losers use the police sirens(to be used only in the case of emergencies) to clear traffic. Korangu kaila poo malai kudutha ippadi than irrukkum. So who do we blame? Each other? Nope my dear brethren, we have to blame ourselves for the mess we are in. We know that drunk driving, rash driving is illegal and yet we do that. What is it that makes people do such things? Is the conquest of breaking laws hard wired into our collectibe psyche?

Bad roads, too many vehicles and very lax law enforment. Well, we elected these fat asses to power. Isn't it time we paid back something in return?

I wonder...

A barrage of angry retorts on the Rediff forum here.

On a related note, a clip on self rgulating taffic some where in India.

Information on the blood alcohol limit via the Delhi Traffic police site.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Chomp your way to the hospital

A burger restaurant in Texas has announced the sale of their 8000 calorie artery clogging monstrosity. Called the Quadraple Bypass burger, this outlet in Tempe, Arizona has announced the launch of the king of all high calorie heart killers. The outlet staff have dressed up like nurses and wheelchairs are on stand by in case any one pops an artery. In this day and age of fitness fads and well being, who in the world gets ideas to make stuff like this or the Fried Coke food?

Picture source.

Check out the outlet's website here.

Another one on the lawsuit filed by the Arizona State Board of Nursing against the Heart Attack Grill.

Via This Planet is Crazy.

Things that drive me crazy when driving

1. Potholes on the road
2. Motocyclists sneeking through available gaps, grazing your side mirror and moving on as if nothing has happened
3. Jaywalkers
4. Pedestrians walking on the road instead of on the sidewalk and not moving their asses when people honk
5. The smell of rotting garbage as the garbage truck passes by
6. Impatient people who can't wait for the red signal to turn green and keep honking at the guy/gyal in front to move even if he/she wants to wait for the siganl to turn green
7. People who drive across medians with impunity
8. Drunk driving and sending people six feet under
9. Fat cops who break traffic laws when driving their shiny Hyundai Accent police cars
10.Horn happy people who want to make you deaf so that you get off the road
11.Rude road users
12.Fish carts and bullock carts
13.Animals on a death wish
14.Illegal temples on the road side and the queues before these temples
15. Speed hungry youngsters
16. People who drive without side view mirrors on motorcycles and don't look left or right before overtaking
17. Autorickshaws
18. Bikes without headlights at night
19. Drivers not using proper indicators when taking a turn
20. People sitting in vehicles spitting on the roads thinking of the roads as spitoons

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Police the pub, weed out the crud

Madras police raided a few clubs on charges of keeping the premises open beyond stipulated hours on Sunday night. Once such raid on a popular night club on Mount Road resulted in the brain-less coppers taking some ladies hostage and interrogating them till 1.30 the next morning. Some of the questions included queries about who the ladies had come with, how much alcohol they had consumed, all of this followed by advice saying that the women will lose their morality and virginity if they venture out after 9 p.m and that the smoke (read cigarette smoke) in the clubs will is not good for them. Does cigarette smoke differentiate betiween men and women? Only a douche bag with bat shit for brains would make a comment like that. The police seemed to have missed out cautioning some drunk minors who were present in the club instead of harrasing mature women who were with in their rights and had valid id cards to prove things. The women were let free after their personal details were collected, further enabling the police to become law enforcing stalkers.

This could be because of that fact that the coppers were not paid their weekly mamool and decided to exact revege by pushing around hapless women instead of working things out (collect mamool of course) with the hotel staff.

All this by a police force made up of lard balls with Hyundai Accent patrol cars at their disposal, not to regulate traffic but to muscle their way through. Incidents like this will surely give the city's already pathetic night life another solid dent.

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